To All My Dear Readers
Its exactly one year since I started my blog. Since then I have grown, changed and moved on and keep on moving ahead. …. every time I write it seems I am turning another page. And this time it’s a whole big chapter. But before I begin again, and go on to the new one, I need to finish off this one
Since last year although I was going ahead, it was mostly ending the things that was not working for me anymore. For instance moving away from being an English Tutor and working towards mental health was not happening as quickly as I wanted. I found that although you finish off with what you don’t want to do anymore, the new things do not come immediately. When one door closes, another does not open immediately always and I guess there is a meaning to it !!!
It was moving on from one scene to another and although it was not all that hard work still physically I did not feel as fit as I liked and needed to relax and re-energize.This happens with change, as the mind needs “Time to adjust to a different pattern” Although working from home sounds easy, when you go to do it, you find it’s a whole big change, a different pattern a different routine to get used to. There were other matters that challenged me and distracted me from the course I was doing, to the extent that got me anxious and was wondering if I had taken on too much too soon. Patience is not one of my virtues and all along I have had this need to move on with most of the new things that happen. And it’s continuing even now. One fact is as you keep on changing and evolving, what so many do not realize is that, “Your Energy/Vibrations changes within you” These can be seen outwardly too, as accordingly you tend to alter the way you dress, eat and do many other things differently !!!
This can be that you have gone back to who you were before everything fell apart, or you have moved on to a better way of thinking and doing things more positively. For me ? Its both. Looking back I can now see what happened to me. I drowned from all the put downs, the stress and got lost. Now, I am found. And yes sometimes it comes up so strong. Why ? What did I do wrong ? Why was it wrong to be me ? I did nothing wrong. I worked hard, very hard, towards the welfare of so many. So many benefited from My Strength, Assets and Abilities, and then I lost ? The society the outside world does not see, or they see what they want. Sometimes people, “Wait to see others fall” as they think someone else has more or they are born rich, talented. Little realizing that all are given Gifts/Talents of their own to make use and Rise. But some of them decided to put me down, but in the process they fell. That is how life is. What goes around comes around, Good or Bad. “Now I have risen” I have built up on that very foundation, I am even a stronger person, who will Stand Tall, never to go down in any storm again. As long as you do not do harm or the wrong things, God, The Higher Powers. The Universe work for you
There is a sad part to this too. As then some of the people who are with you when you change no longer in the same energy field as you. Its not you are higher or anyone is lower. Its just that you have moved on to another energy level. Yes but that doesn’t mean everyone goes away completely. Even otherwise all those we come across even family, doesn’t stay with us all the time, everyday, one will go mad !!! Be it family or friends, being human beings we can rationalize and come to terms with another’s change and accept. No one changes from a human being to an animal. There are reasons to change. This is called the survival of the fittest. A human being changes according to how he or she can manage to fit in and live peacefully in an ever changing world. This has to be Understood by all intelligent human beings. That is why we are humans. Because we have brains and mind to think and rationalize !!!
With all these roller coaster life I have gone through, some have Not understood and moved away, despite trying to explain. In life you lose some and gain some we have to accept that. But then right now there is a Wonderful group of people around me. In real life where I have worked and moving around. Friends and family who have always stood by me, if not I would not be writing here. If I was not found, on my escapes suddenly into the nights running in fear, without knowing why there is No Deepa Nilamani today, and I am most grateful to them. I cannot imagine myself what I had become. Somehow I guess I had to live to tell the story for so many others for them to know and have hope
Yes there is a new family growing now, the I net family. Face Book and now many Bloggers have and are connecting daily. Some are very young, who have started to look up to me for strength. So many talk to me. Some have gone through worse and my heart aches for their pain. But they take comfort from what I write and take Strength from My Strength. We all have begun to share and support each other. Its a very satisfying feeling that I can give Hope and Strength to others, from the darkness I have gone through. So that they too can Rise Up and pull another out of their darkness. And so the chain goes on !!!
I am Thankful and Grateful to everyone who has become My Family now, A Soul Family, brothers and sisters. Sons and daughters. And together we go on, “Lighting other’s Paths, Comforting and giving Strength when another is weak. As in Life we all go down at certain times and we all need a helping hand to pull us up. We are One
I hope you enjoyed reading and learnt something new and useful from this. If there are others who can make use of this please do share or pass it on. Thank you for reading 🙂
I wish you Many Blessings of Love, Light and Healing Energies ❤
Deepa Nilamani ❤