Hello My Dear Readers,
As this is my journey along the path of healing, I thought I will write here as and how I am moving on with my life. Sometimes it may be the same things here and there, but they will be different each time, because we keep on changing and evolving as we go along !!!
Its really difficult to draw a line when you have become well and when you have really healed. Both can be on the balance as we cannot see the mind like the physical self. We ourselves don’t know what is still hiding in our minds waiting jump out, or if the memories or the hurts, have gone back so much so, almost never to come back !!!
Those who are really following my journey, are aware that recently I did the tying up the lose-end business, and ended one part of my life. Now I have got the urge to contact some of them who have been there for me, supporting and helping me at various times and ways. These things does happen from time to time. Meaning as you go along its like closing one door after another. In life you cannot just close a door once and for all and finish off that part. As we keep on changing and moving on, we keep on closing one chapter after another. Its just life reading a book. As in a book too there are many chapters and until you finish, you keep on reading one after the other, till the end !!!
I believe I have come to a big turning point of healing. I almost feel I have now become, who I was before all these upheavals happened. I remember all what I used to do, and I can’t believe the drama I have gone through, and how I have survived. Its like I have woken up from a very long dream, only no prince woke me up 🙂 I woke myself up !!!
Whoever is there for you or not, ultimately its you who has to heal yourself. It has to e a combination of many things. You need to get proper guidance from the medical personnel, medication and above all, “Make an extreme effort to do anything and everything possible to become positive and pull yourself up” Once you decide and begin to come up, others can give a helping hand. Being depressed or mentally unwell is like you are in a deep down place alone, where no one can reach you. The moment you decide to become well and begin to be active, its like coming out of that ditch. Then others are able to help you, reach out to you and pull you up 🙂
It has been a Very Long Journey. Actually it has been longer than half of what I have lived so far. And still 6 months ago there were few incidents that shook me, that trying to survive, helped me even more to understand what happened to me at certain points of my life which had been puzzling me for a long time. So actually they came as it came as blessings in disguise. In order to survive, I came out of my comfort zone, which only now I realise that there was such thing as a comfort zone, where I was concerned. What things we ourselves discover about us is the surprising thing. And I did so many things otherwise I would have not done. This is because I was Determined to Survive and I believe I have really survived and come out quite well, the reason I am write confidently about how I coped 🙂
In life we all go through various hardships at various times in different ways until the end. And sometimes yes, we all do wonder, why did all that happen to us, for what reason. Some answers don’t come immediately but they do in time, may be a few will not. Hopefully one day I will know the answers to my questions !!!
I pray and meditate to reflex on how things happened in the past and how best I can move on. I am discovering so much about me now. What I have forgotten and who I have become by overcoming all this challenges. I am who I was in the past, yet I have changed too !!! Life is such we all change all the time and we can go on learning and advancing ourselves as long as we have life. How wonderful to keep on updating your knowledge and to learn new things. I really enjoy doing so and with all what I have gone through, I find that, “Life can become Wonderful, if we have the strength and patience to keep on working towards it” 🙂
There are exceptions I know, just like everything. But for most of you, if you take courage, you can turn your life around to look at life in a positive way and make the best of who you are and what you have. We have only one life to live, and almost all of us are given, something special to make a mark in this world. For ourselves and then to others, at least to one person. We cannot change the whole world not all of us, although I wish we could. Don’t you ?
So we need to make use of what we have got. As I always end up saying, Be strong, have Courage and be Patient until the winds change and life turn in favour for you. It does, it has to. Winter doesn’t stay for ever nor does summer. We are part of this universe so we also move on with the clock of the universe. Your day will surely come ❤
Thank you for reading and hope you have enjoyed what I have written. Please excuse me if I have made a few mistakes, I will correct them later on. Any questions or comments are most welcome !
Many Blessings of Love and Light from me !
Deepa Nilamani ❤