Hello To All My Dear Readers 🙂
I am re- doing some of the articles as with time, I am completely recovered from the 15 year long term depression, and been completely free of it almost 3 years up to ~ 9th October 2016. I have expanded my knowledge and gained more experiences in life. I have moved on tremendously from the past and am moving on still. Life is an ever changing process and the only constant is, Change 🙂
Some of the old articles are my past, and I want to write how I am, “Now” the present time. In short, one can say I am, “Re-writing my past again, in a positive way” Am I taking medication ? Yes basic dose of, preventive medication and going for regular check ups. I value my health very much, especially now as I know he difference between being sick and healthy. I have a healthy diet, proper exercises, rest and relaxation so that I am fit and healthy, both in body and mind. This is how I can write about depression after three years of being free from it 🙂
After all these years, looking back, I have now realized that this is very true. Although at the time when you are going through all the stress and trauma you are not aware. Its not possible to Let Go or Leave stressful life situations just like that, especially if there are other lives depending on you, so very often one is almost forced to tolerate and bear up whether you like it or not, until such time that you can make those changes. Sometimes when the load of stress becomes too much, it can be a very small thing that breaks you finally. It’s said, “That it’s the last straw that breaks the camels back” It’s also like a volcano erupting. I have always thought of it this way. That everything keeps on collecting and collecting, and suddenly the mind blows !!!
The sadness and grief eats into you, it goes deeper and stays longer than necessary so much so that alters the chemical balance of your mind and body. This is something that many, Do Not Know ? Why ? How can anyone say, it’s all in the mind. Mental illnesses are just not in the mind its in the body too, as mind is in the body. How can people think that mind s elsewhere !!! When someone is physically ill then that person is ill. When its a mental illness, “Its only in the mind or there is no such thing as mental illness” This is something that some of the so called highly educated people think and say, and it is Time to change. This is why I am writing and doing this blog. Not to earn money, But to make people aware and enlighten the foolish !!! Sorry these are things that I am still going through and I am writing on, “Behalf of whole of Humanity” ❤
I know depression. It makes one feel lethargic, sleepy, lack of appetite and no energy to do anything. It disrupts your day to day life and you cannot be or do things how you did before. All illnesses are psychosomatic ~ both mind and body. So when the mind gets affected, naturally when the health of the body goes down. I know what Bipolar disorder means, its under control now. I know what PTSD is too. It’s Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Remembering the past Trauma, “The Grief, Painful things one has gone through in life” And knowingly so many people in real life and even on the I net still stress and disturb people like us when all what we are trying to do is to HELP others. My Intentions are Purely to Help, to give Hope to Live, Not end their lives, so that they too can lift their heads up. Sometimes the world, the society can be a very cruel and a vicious place !!!
Why we get sad or upset is because we are unable to be who we are and do the things that we like. Yes we know we all have to abide by some form of discipline. We need to fit into family, work, society to some extent, as human beings we cannot just say and do things only how it suits us. But sometimes we are controlled too much. Instead of “adjusting” to fit in or live in harmony with another person or persons (it can be any life situation), sometimes we have to “completely change” from who we are. This is going completely against our natural way of life, our personality that we are born with. You can think of yourself wearing a dress or suit that is too tight, not to your color/style, or eating foods that is not to your taste. How do you feel ? Uncomfortable. This causes friction, stress. Which in turn makes you uneasy, unhappy, even angry having to do something you don’t like. Naturally. We are born to be who we are. For a short time yes, as sometimes we are compelled to do things we are not comfortable with, in certain situations. Long term ? No ? Why ? Because we are born to be free, and constantly that real person inside of us, “The real me” is struggling to come out. Again another reason why depression happens, when our spirits get dimmed. When we are not “Allowed to be who we are, to be able to live the life we are born to live
This is where I always say it’s, “Guidance and Not control” Guidance is with loving kindness, and controlling is being selfish ~ where one is almost forced to fit in according to another person’s needs and desires. So in life doing things that is against your personality keeps on stressing you. Apparently there can be lack of understanding and love too as you don’t have to go through such difficult situations if there are people who really care, and see or know what is happening and help with the situation. This is of course, “Before depression sets in” Once it does of course it’s a different story !!!
Yes many think its easy to say get out of it. But it is a, “Very Strong Force” it takes over you. It’s like a black mist that descends upon you from nowhere. For me it was not 24/7, but from time to time it used to raise its head up. There were times for days on end, I just couldn’t keep my head up, as if my neck had no strength. Where ever I went I used to put my head down and sleep. My head felt like a heavy stone. At one time I was about 30 kilos less than now, around 40 kilos, with hardly any appetite almost half of my weight. Now ? A bit over 😛 This is why I have posted my face, to see what I am now as proof, Happy Healthy and Smiling. I feel immensely Blessed 🙂
When I think of these times, I shiver and its a wonder, a Miracle almost, how I got out of it. But I worked at it and still do. I become so overwhelmed with gratitude, and makes me to write. Those who have Not gone through a severe life crisis, cannot understand what it is to Bounce back and come back to your normal self. This is why I have Dedicated myself for service. “Pure service is Not expecting anything in return” Just by writing and giving my knowledge itself is a Joy. I cannot describe the satisfaction I get. Service is in my blood from generations. So much so I cannot mention anyone’s name. But this is, My knowledge from what I have gone through and what I am doing. My own venture, which I feel I am Blessed to have got the opportunity to serve all people as much as possible 🙂
You do need medication and counselling/therapy and what ever medical assistance to fight it. Just like all illnesses, mental or physical. But a major part of it is in your hands too. You need to work at it. You need to be persistent. If after 15 long years, I have defeated this force, “You Can too” We are all part of the universe and the universe gives us the Strength to be who we are. We need only to try ❤
Thank you all for reading. I do hop you have found something new and useful or reminded or confirmed things you already knew. Its a very big relief to have written this and finished. As then “I have sort of Let Gone” that chapter. Been thinking of writing this for quite some time. Please do share or pass on for others who can make use of what I have written. It is useful as its first hand knowledge and tips. You can see me as I am now and I am living proof of overcoming depression and leading a completely normal life 🙂
God Bless and Many Blessings of Love, Light and Healing Energies from me ❤
Deepa Nilamani 🙂